Is Retention the Answer?

When my son was in kindergarten, the school recommended that he be held back. He's now in third grade and is still having problems with his schoolwork. We did tutoring for a while but discontinued it due to the cost. Because of our son's academic problems, my husband and I are now considering holding him back. Would this be a good idea? How should we handle this? -- Debating
Answer: You are not the first parent to face this problem. Whether your son would have profited from being held back earlier, no one will ever know. Being held back now could be very traumatic for him. Plus, most of the statistics on retention do not show it to be the great problem solver for academic difficulties that many parents and teachers think it is.
Talk with the teacher immediately and find out exactly where your child is having problems with his schoolwork and how serious they are. Ask the teacher specifically how he can be helped. Is summer school the answer? If the school does not have a summer program, investigate the possibilities at local colleges. Does he need a tutor? If so, consider using a high-school student. In this case, the teacher needs to spell out exactly what your child needs to work on. Find out also how you can help him improve his skills, and if there are online Web sites that could help him improve his skills. You must have a plan in place to help him now and during the summer.
Of course, there is always the possibility that a learning disability is causing your child to struggle in school. If so, you want to initiate the process now to have him tested, as it can take quite a while to get children tested and a plan in place to help them.